FAQ regarding Divorce # 10: What exactly is a Divorce Decree?

We usually ask you to consider the Divorce Decree in terms of being a “Rule Book” for all of the various things that could or might happen after the Divorce is granted. The actual granting of the Divorce is nothing more than the Judge declaring that the marriage is dissolved for either “grounds” or on the “no fault” ground of insupportablility. Insupportability just means that there are so-called “irreconcilable differences” -- referred to in Texas as a “discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the legitimate ends of the marriage relationship,” provided further that “there is no reasonable expectation of reconciliation.”

The rest of the Decree (as well as other pleadings referred to as Temporary Orders or Final Orders) provides guidelines and rules for dealing with any children (such as custody or “conservatorship,” the powers of conservatorship, visitation, child support, medical support, and health insurance coverage), property (such as assets and debts), and various other issues such as any change of name, taxes, and similar matters.

FAQ regarding Divorce # 2: Should I get divorced?

Sometimes people want a lawyer to tell them whether they should get a divorce or not. This is usually not the function of a lawyer and any guidance in this area is personal opinion, rather than legal advice, so please treat it as such and proceed carefully. However, most attorneys will use their experience to explain the circumstances under which someone may want to proceed with a Divorce and the possible outcomes from such proceedings. Each lawyer will explain it differently, but here are some common situations when we agree that a spouse would be justified in filing for Divorce:

a) Physical Abuse – No one should be required to live with the fear of being physically battered when there is a disagreement among spouses;

b) Adultery or Cheating on you by your Spouse – Marriage implies an element of exclusivity. Although no one is perfect, if your spouse insists on maintaining relationships outside of marriage, then Divorce would seem appropriate;

c) Alcohol or Drugs – Again, no one is perfect, but if the substances control your life (such as interfering with a normal relationship with you, your children, or with work obligations, or results in repeated criminal incidents) then Divorce is understandable.

Oftentimes, people cite to financial problems, mental cruelty, mental or physical problems, or irreconcilable differences, as grounds justifying divorce. Every relationship probably has an element of each of these issues. The question is whether such problems and/or differences destroy the legitimate ends of the marriage relationship. If you have unsuccessfully tried counseling and/or medical intervention, or your spouse is unwilling to obtain help or change, then it is understandable that you want to end the marriage.